Bad Bands W/ Bad Hair...
I went to a concert in Brooklyn last night and got back around 4 in the morning...it's OK, I had pass. It is now 8 in the morning and I'm sitting at a desk protecting freedom.
The concert was cool, full of hipsters. What I noticed is there is a correlation between how hip someone wants to be and how bad a haircut he has. There were also other rules that had to be followed, such as not taking your jacket off even if it was insanely hot, not moving ones feet to dance (swaying, instead, from side to side and letting your head slowly bobble like the chihuahua from taco bell commercials of yore) and, of course, the requisite ugly glasses.
The opening band was horrendous. There was a bassist who was really cool...she couldn't sing for shit, but she played well and had this really cool haircut that covered one eye and one ear, but was short on the otherside. She also wore a dress that appeared to be made out of paper and red boots. The lead singer was a girl who looked like Lili Taylor...but as though Lili Taylor had done far more drugs earlier in life and bleacher her hair blonde. She didn't really "fit" with the rest of the band and had this horrible gimmick where she purposely had no stage presence and instead stood with her hands behind her back and eyes shut. I think it was supposed to make her whining drone more meaningful and deep...instead, it was just sad and annoying. The last guy in the band was some dude who was as tall as me but weighed maybe 120 lbs. He had on a black t-shirt with a huge rip under the arm and his arms were the size of my wrists. He had, of course, a horrible horrible haircut that covered both his eyes and was incredibly greasy. Hip. (I thought back to how Adam Graf used to say the world would be better if we all walked around naked. People would be less pretentious because they wouldn't have to hide behind clothes to make themselves seem like something they weren't. This guy was the verification of that...without his black shirt and pants, he wasn't hip...he was just a weak, skinny pasty boy with bad hair.)
The second band was even worse...far more gimmicks. On stage, they looked a little like a casting call for a volkswagon commercial...every trendy hip twenty-something personality you could think of. I half expected them to pile into a jetta and drive around for a while on stage just so we could see how really hip they were. Their music sucked and that's really all there is to say about that. Oh wait, there was one thing...the lead was the antithesis of the girl before. He had nothing but stage presence. He moved, swayed and gyrated like a rock star. He sung like a dog with a tick up its ass.
The last band was really good, but, because we're cadets, we had to leave early to catch the last train. There was a dude on the subway who was singing country tunes and playing his guitar...he was really good. When he finished one song and we still had three stops left, my friend Dan said, "Hey, music man, we're on till 6th Ave, how about another?" He then played Ring of Fire. He ended out on the same stop as us and Dan talked to him...unfortunately, he too was a bit pretentious. Man, it seems like New York is full of pretentious people.
Apparently, something about our network wont let me read Chuck's blog anymore. I'm kinda pissed about that one.
The concert was cool, full of hipsters. What I noticed is there is a correlation between how hip someone wants to be and how bad a haircut he has. There were also other rules that had to be followed, such as not taking your jacket off even if it was insanely hot, not moving ones feet to dance (swaying, instead, from side to side and letting your head slowly bobble like the chihuahua from taco bell commercials of yore) and, of course, the requisite ugly glasses.
The opening band was horrendous. There was a bassist who was really cool...she couldn't sing for shit, but she played well and had this really cool haircut that covered one eye and one ear, but was short on the otherside. She also wore a dress that appeared to be made out of paper and red boots. The lead singer was a girl who looked like Lili Taylor...but as though Lili Taylor had done far more drugs earlier in life and bleacher her hair blonde. She didn't really "fit" with the rest of the band and had this horrible gimmick where she purposely had no stage presence and instead stood with her hands behind her back and eyes shut. I think it was supposed to make her whining drone more meaningful and deep...instead, it was just sad and annoying. The last guy in the band was some dude who was as tall as me but weighed maybe 120 lbs. He had on a black t-shirt with a huge rip under the arm and his arms were the size of my wrists. He had, of course, a horrible horrible haircut that covered both his eyes and was incredibly greasy. Hip. (I thought back to how Adam Graf used to say the world would be better if we all walked around naked. People would be less pretentious because they wouldn't have to hide behind clothes to make themselves seem like something they weren't. This guy was the verification of that...without his black shirt and pants, he wasn't hip...he was just a weak, skinny pasty boy with bad hair.)
The second band was even worse...far more gimmicks. On stage, they looked a little like a casting call for a volkswagon commercial...every trendy hip twenty-something personality you could think of. I half expected them to pile into a jetta and drive around for a while on stage just so we could see how really hip they were. Their music sucked and that's really all there is to say about that. Oh wait, there was one thing...the lead was the antithesis of the girl before. He had nothing but stage presence. He moved, swayed and gyrated like a rock star. He sung like a dog with a tick up its ass.
The last band was really good, but, because we're cadets, we had to leave early to catch the last train. There was a dude on the subway who was singing country tunes and playing his guitar...he was really good. When he finished one song and we still had three stops left, my friend Dan said, "Hey, music man, we're on till 6th Ave, how about another?" He then played Ring of Fire. He ended out on the same stop as us and Dan talked to him...unfortunately, he too was a bit pretentious. Man, it seems like New York is full of pretentious people.
Apparently, something about our network wont let me read Chuck's blog anymore. I'm kinda pissed about that one.
posted by Adam at 6:07 AM
2 Comments:
What exactly does "sitting at a desk protecting freedom" entail?
Nobody can read Charlie's blog, as far as I can tell. What a tease.
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