compliments...I think

So, lately I've had a slew of semi-awkward/back-handed or otherwise interesting and unsolicited compliments. I thought I would list them here because they made me laugh to read them, and I hope they'll do the same for you:

1. From one of my climbing friends (who, it must be noted to see why it's funny, is a lesbian):

We did deep water soloing today. It kind of sucked.
Climbing shit wet, with prune fingers, start holds all slime for your feet and things for your hands being ouchy (since the prune fingers).
Also boats going by making waves that push you into the walls and shit.
I thought of you and how well you fill out your bathing suit and it made me miss you a lot. Plus with your good personality it would have made the suck more enjoyable.

2. From an old roommate recounting a conversation she had with someone who asked, "so you lived with Adam?"

I was like yes, he was a good roommate but he used to cook with his shirt off ...to include when he was cooking things like bacon.

3. From a friend I met at a bar the night before, upon friending me on Facebook and seeing I was (nearly) thirty:

Oh, now it makes sense! That's why you were different. You're a grown up.