Grey turning Blue...

posting...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 18:24:00 +0000

I will soon (hopefully) be out of Iraq. Once I am, I will probably start writing more often. For now, it's too difficult due to the fact that officially, if it has to do with the Army at all, I need to get it aproved by my command (to ensure no security violations and the like). Anyway, for those of you who occassionally check up on this...hopefully soon I will resume more regularly.

Noonan strikes again...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 18:49:00 +0000

Peggy Noonan, for those of you who don't know, is one of my favorite writers. She was also a speech writer for Reagan. She penned the following after the death of Senator Kennedy (I know, it's been a while, but the internet here is slow, so cut me some slack). I enjoyed it very much, but mostly I was caught by the last paragraph, the way in our current political climate, it seems almost unimaginable now that the level of civility, friendship and genuine caring for one another across party lines was not just acceptable, but the norm. Can anyone else even imagine a scene like this taking place today?

Read here.

Well done Tyler...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 07:27:00 +0000

LT. Tyler Edward Parten USA (KIA)

It's taken me a while to write about Tyler. Other than Adam, he was the closest friend I've lost. The three of us were in Glee Club together actually, for a brief period, before Tyler quick to move onto better things...he started a one show band at school, which played at the Firstie Club when we were plebes and I wasn't allowed to go watch.

I want to write eloquently about his laugh and smile...about what times we shared and how much I'll miss him, but I can't. Every time I begin to type, I begin to well up and have to stop. I'm in the MWR...no place for an MI LT to be seen crying over friends.

I look at the picture above and I remember taking my own Firstie Photo. How excited we all were to have all the accouterments of our success...saber, ring, sash, stripes...and how forward looking we were to leaving it all behind to get our single gold bar. Some of us were destined to become great officers, others...not so much. Tyler, we all knew, was in the former category.

We took those pictures, it seemed at the time, to remember a moment when the whole world was ahead of us and nothing could hurt us. When trips to the firstie club, weekends in New York City and a life of adventure lay ahead. Too often, however, it now seems the photos were taken so, when they were needed, they could be dusted off, posted and remembered for who we were in times like this.

I won't write any further. I will say that if you've read my blog over the years, then you have read about Tyler, even if un-named. When I traveled with the Arabic club, he was there...when I went to the Debutant Ball, he was there...for my four years at West Point, Tyler was there. And now...he's gone, and I just don't understand.

Well done Tyler, Be Thou At Peace.

Alexandra Rosenberg

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 16:37:00 +0000

Alex's sister was my classmate who had been in my company for Beast Barracks. A smart, funny girl as well. I was lucky enough to meet Alex last summer when she was at Fort Hood for some training and we were able to float the Guadalupe River together (a favorite hobby of mine...if floating can be a hobby).

I couldn't help but post this...another person I know who is more inspiring and successful than I could ever be. Congratulations to her, one of Glamour Magazine's Top Ten Collegiate Women.

Below is the write-up the Dean (intellectual rock-star he is) posted to facebook:

Our cadets earn recognition across the country and around the world for many different achievements. Recently, Glamour Magazine named Cadet Alex Rosenberg, Class of 2010, one of the Top 10 College Women of the Year. Alex is an amazing cadet and a terrific student -- she is number one academically in her class (of over 1000 cadets), with a Grade Point Average over 4.2. She is majoring in Sociology but is also taking additional courses in Chemistry and Life Sciences to prepare her for medical school, because Alex, who aspires to be an Army doctor, was just recommended for our Medical School Program following graduation.

This is far from the only honor that Alex has earned. Last year she was selected for a Truman Scholarship for graduate studies. Her academic program score, an amazing 4.27, includes two perfect semesters with all A+ grades. Alex has personally tutored other cadets for hundreds of hours in Chemistry, Chinese, and English, and she developed a company-wide tutoring program that helped her cadet company raise their academic standing significantly. She volunteers for Big Brothers and Big Sisters as well as at Tripler Hospital in Hawaii the summer before last, and scored a 353 (on a 300 scale) on her most recent Army Physical Fitness Test. This past summer, Alex spent seven weeks doing volunteer work on Crossroads Africa. It's no wonder that Glamour Magazine selected her for this honor.

Alex is not the first cadet to be selected in this category -- Erica Watson, Class of 2001, was one of Glamour's Top 10 College Women in her senior year. Erica was also selected for a Rhodes Scholarship that year.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 08:35:00 +0000

Real posting will resume as soon as I'm able to get to a computer more frequently.

Until then, a short note:
I am coming quickly upon a time when I must make a decision about my future, be that in the Army or otherwise. I am, as of now, unsure.

One of my best friends, and his wife, Gosia, are now traveling America and Canada (follow their adventures here http://anothermanstenderloin.blogspot.com) I think back to nine years ago when Lee and I met. He was a young 20 yr old from Tennessee and I was similarly naive and from So Cal. Our friendship was unlikely, but more importantly, our futures uncertain. Almost a decade ago, if someone were to tell me I'd be an Officer and Lee would be traveling the world with his Polish wife as modern day vagabonds, I'd probably have laughed.

Life is, to say the least, unpredictable, and if the next decade has as many twists as the last, at least I know it will have been a good ride.

Pat Buchanan...not so smart.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 03:42:00 +0000

Pat Buchanan...
Aptly makes the case here, unintentionally of course, why minorities will for the most part continue to feel the Republican party is no place for them.

Choice quotes:

[the liberal media] archly demand that conservatives accord a self-described "affirmative action baby" from Princeton a respect they never for a moment accorded a pro-life conservative mother of five from Idaho State, Sarah Palin.

Pundits here gets hoots of appreciation for doing to a white Christian woman what would constitute a hate crime if done to a "wise Latina woman."
______________

Adding just 1 percent to the white vote is thus the same as adding 10 percent to the candidate's Hispanic vote.
______________

[republican likely voters] are the folks whose jobs have been outsourced to China and Asia, who pay the price of affirmative action when their sons and daughters are pushed aside to make room for the Sonia Sotomayors. These are the folks who want the borders secured and the illegals sent back.
_______________

What they must do is expose Sotomayor, as they did not in the case of Ginsburg, as a political activist whose career bespeaks a lifelong resolve to discriminate against white males to the degree necessary to bring about an equality of rewards in society.

Sonia is, first and foremost, a Latina. She has not hesitated to demand, even in college and law school, ethnic and gender preferences for her own. Her concept of justice is race-based.

Yes...these are all quotes from the same article.

I will agree with the last statement, that Sotamayor's concept of justice is race-based. Why? Because her reality has been race-based! Is that so hard to see, or is it supposed to be that, once someone has overcome a lifetime of disadvantage and (yes) racism because of her race, she is then supposed to forget all that and see things "blindly"? This is not to say she should, or would "discriminate against white males" but only that her understanding of "justice," as experienced, is not nearly color blind.

race

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 07:47:00 +0000

Post Ricci (well, even pre-Ricci), there seems to be a lot of discussion about race in America again. I should say, the discussion has been picked up by those who don't often discuss race in America. I don't have too much time to write, but it seems as though there is a consensus (at least amongst those who own magazines and are on Fox news) that America is now a color-blind and equal society throughout which the opportunities that are available to one are available to all--equally.

I wonder if we are willing to extend that belief to everything, or only when it appears to affect white men. Are we going to re-vamp public education? housing? banking? Maybe we'll take a look at incarceration and three-strikes laws...

To paraphrase the actual opinion:

[many a minority's] situation is "unfortunate" and... "understandably attract this Court’s sympathy." Post, at 1, 39. But "sympathy" is not what petitioners have a right to demand. What they have a right to demand is evenhanded enforcement of the law—of Title VII’s prohibition against discrimination based on race. And that is what, until today’s decision, has been denied them.

So yes, let's move forward and end discrimination based on race...everywhere we see it, not just when it affects white men.

Noonan

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 05:54:00 +0000

Last post for the day, because I thought it related to my two last posts. Peggy Noonan wrote the following regarding Iran:

When the young rise against the old, the future rises against the past. In that contest, the future always wins. The question is timing: soon or some years from now?

Read my previous two posts previous and you'll see why I find it ironic that Peggy Noonan, a Republican, wrote this.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 05:32:00 +0000

I have received two books from my friend Tim since being here by David Foster Wallace as well as a recommendation to read him from another friend as well. I have, however, decided that he is not a good author. He is incredibly gimmicky and the more of him I read, the more I dislike the gimmick. In fact, I've quit reading his books and essays and wonder why more people haven't. Yes...the man played tennis and knows a lot about it. Yes, he finds himself in situations where his outsider status means he can look upon everything with a superior disdain (or not-so-thinly veiled desire to be part of it). But...why should I care? Also, there's really nothing to be gained from reading his essays. There are very few times where I thought of something differently, saw beauty where I hadn't before, laughed out loud, almost cried...felt anything really, other than a desire to put the book down or at least be done with the mind-numbing footnotes without having actually read them.

I thought for a moment about re-writing this post in Wallace's style, but Blogger doesn't allow for footnotes, and one knows one can't write in Wallace's style without at least 75% as many footnotes as there is text in the body. Likewise, I'd also have to refer to Wallace as "W" or "the auth." to let you know how thoroughly I've rejected accepted writing styles and how much more I have to focus on the overall story and can't be bothered with details like writing out a name.

That got me thinking, however, about other authors with particular styles I do appreciate and why. Like Peggy Noonan for example. Her short sentences, often ended with triads of things or emotions, seem to always move me, even when I disagree. Or Sedaris, who is just funny as all getup, but always follows the same arc to his stories (vignette followed by one or two line lesson learned/summation). But...at least their writing, while repetitive and slightly gimmicky as well, elicits some emotion. With Wallace, I tend to feel like it's the literary equivalent of watching a documentary about...nothing. But a pretentious documentary about nothing.

Remembering Due Diligence

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 05:11:00 +0000

A friend of mine who had been at DLI the same time as I and has since gotten out of the Army and dedicated himself to fighting against Don't Ask/Don't Tell posted the following on facebook. I think it outlines very well the fight he's been waging, as well as proves that one person can make a difference. It's also a call to action for those of us who care to make change:

HR 1059. This was the original Military Readiness Enhancement Act, introduced by Marty Meehan of Massachusetts in 2005. When learning media sound bites in that rush between getting out of the Army in November of 2005 and launching the Call To Duty tour the following February, supporting

HR 1059 was a pretty good stock answer to any sort of inquiry regarding what can be done. I don’t think it ever exceeded 130 cosponsors, and we never saw it as a viable bill. Still, it was some movement in Congress – certainly more than in the past 10 or so years – and the beginning of the real movement for repeal. It seemed I had entered activism at just the right time.

HR 1246. This was the second bill introduced by Marty Meehan, still called the Military Readiness Enhancement Act. Marty would lead the bill until he left a seat that would eventually be filled by Nancy Tsongas, and the bill would be passed on to Ellen Tauscher of California. We still didn’t believe the bill was going anywhere, and served mostly as a means to bring attention to the issue and to gauge Congressional support. Again we instructed people to encourage their representative to sign on, and to just be more active in the movement in general. The bill maxed out at 149 cosponsors before it expired and, like its predecessor, never left committee. Though a few court cases existed challenging ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ on various grounds, repealing DADT in the 110th Congress was never viable.

HR 1283. This is the third iteration of MREA, this time introduced by Tauscher. Word is Patrick Murphy of Colorado will be taking over the bill soon, but the exact date won’t be known until Tauscher is confirmed in her new prospective space in the State Department. The bill already has 147 cosponsors, and for some reason the repeal community is much more optimistic about this bill than the last two. Perhaps a progressive intellectual President encourages that optimism. Or maybe edging so close to 150 cosponsors creates a certain excitement that we didn’t allow ourselves to feel before. I suspect a little of both, combined with the fact that the public, at least in this scenario, seems to be way ahead of Congress in terms of opinions on repeal. Regardless, the energy in the move for repeal seems to be bringing attention to options other than MREA and the courts that are at the very least intriguing.

Whatever path we choose, a real debate over repeal is brewing. Are we ready? Who knows. I think the momentum is such that we had better hope we are, as I don’t think we’ll have much of a choice otherwise. I know I myself wasn’t expecting this debate for at least another few years, and I think most who say otherwise are either lying or were simply idealistic these past few years.

I have to admit I’m a little nervous. This issue can quickly get out of hand, and the debate, if we’re not careful, can easily be reduced to ridiculous vitriol that is neither relevant nor productive. Jumping at any easy fix is not always beneficial in the short term, and risks must be carefully weighed. We need to be vigilant, we need to be strategic, and we need to be smart.

Fifteen years of hard work is resting on the next few decisions that are made regarding DADT. Let’s proceed with aggressive optimism, but more importantly, let’s proceed with prudence and due diligence.

Iran's population has a median age of 27

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 08:20:00 +0000

I read that line today just before lunch. I'm 28 years old. I was thinking the other day as we were on a convoy to some place unimportant and I saw kids running down the street that most of them had never known a reality, a daily life, in which uniformed, armed Americans weren't rolling past their houses daily. The people of Iran who are my age have never known anything but theocracy--and yet, they're in the streets risking life and limb for freedoms that we would never think twice about.

If I take nothing else from deployment, it's the realization that one can never take his view of the world for granted. There is no such thing as "un-biased" as each of us can only view the world through the lens we've come to acquire through experience, time and life (suddenly I think of the words, "a wise Latina..." but that's a post for another time). But, more importantly, while I've somewhat always known that, the differences between how I view the world, an Iranian, an Iraqi or a Chinese is far vaster than I had ever realized.

The flip side to this is that, while Americans have far more that unites us than separates, the same idea applies similarly to our subsets. Someone who grows up in NYC or Augusta, GA or rural Pennsylvania is not going to see life similarly to me, from rural San Diego. But, I'm beginning to realize, I shouldn't expect them to, but only try to find the common ground upon which we can build.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 09:26:00 +0000

I wrote some years ago about how I liked the rule in TX that if you were in the top 10% of your high school class, you were admitted to the TX school of your choice. It leveled an un-level playing field and allowed kids an opportunity to compete they otherwise would not have had. While TX refused to fix the situation in its high schools and correct inequalities, this law trumped that.

Now, however, TX is changing the law because too many students are getting into the good schools. TX state Rep Dan Branch said:

“Texas doesn’t have that many national Tier 1 universities, and we were about to overwhelm our major Tier 1 university with automatic admissions..."

So, it seems, the program is over, or at least severely curbed because not enough of the kids who are already advantaged by a good high school are getting into college and TX is worried that kids from other high schools are lowering the quality of their colleges. This may not seem that absurd an argument until you realize that the same people worried about the quality of the colleges being affected by lower-quality high school graduates are the same people who refuse to take steps to rectify the situation in lower-quality high-schools.

The article is here and I recommend reading it.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Sat, 30 May 2009 07:00:00 +0000

I can't get into everything going on here right now, but I thought an update might be called for, so here goes:
1. I got to go back to the big FOB and hang out w/ a friend of mine from USNA...that was nice.
2. I had a soldier re-deploy early to join the USMA class of 2013. I'm pretty proud of her and wish her luck (if you know me personally and want to send her care packages and whatnot, let me know and I'll give you her mailing address).
3. work is picking up, which is good
4. I may get my passport in time to go to Tanzania
5. I made two not-so-big but still bad mis-steps work-wise which I will have to work fairly hard at overcoming. Live in learn I guess.

Five more months or so before I can resume writing regularly again.

prop 8 reaction

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Wed, 27 May 2009 05:21:00 +0000

Just my initial reaction to everything I've read this morning...but if I read about how the ruling was "really" pro-gay because it reserves civil unions which are "really just like marriage anyway" I say put up all the secondary water-fountains and entrances for the coloreds again because separate really is the new equal.

courts

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Sat, 23 May 2009 07:21:00 +0000

So, apparently the President may nominate someone to the Supreme Court next week. Also, California's Supreme Court will rule on Prop 8. Does anyone else think this could go poorly? If, which I doubt, California's Court strikes down Prop 8, conservatives across the country will rally around "judicial activism" and make what should be an easy confirmation an ugly partisan battle.

Also, six months left...then I will resume posting more regularly.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Fri, 15 May 2009 19:27:00 +0000

I've been very introspective lately. I think it stems from a few random happenings that all seem to be echoing one another. At least four or five people have asked me about high school and who I was back then...others have asked my age...and others what I plan on for the future. Those things combined create quite the mess in my head as each of them presents one thing or another that I can sit around pondering for hours to no avail.

I have always been an outlier--the oft mentioned square peg. I would go into all the various ways in which I am rounded where others square and black when they are white, but for anyone who knows me, they are obvious enough. The point, however, is that I've never quite felt comfortable around anyone. I am rather awkward (as my little sister will attest), and have self esteem which is in negative correlation to my outward arrogance. When it comes to dating, the one thing that I find most attractive (someone who is intellectually intimidating) is also the one thing that makes me begin to sound like an idiot.

I think I had a point somewhere up above but alas, I've been sidetracked.

I...as odd as this is to type as I sat down here to share words...am for once at a loss for words to describe how I feel right now.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 07 May 2009 09:20:00 +0000

So, the big news I read this morning is that the Mormons may have posthumously baptized Barak Obama's Mom. Ok...so...big deal. If you're not Mormon, it means some people put on silly clothes and did a little ceremony that you don't believe in. If you are Mormon, it means you offered someone a chance at eternal bliss and happiness (or something of that nature) that she otherwise wouldn't have had. Why does it matter? It doesn't. It's a bunch of BS. What the Catholics do in their church, or the Mormons in theirs, or the Zoroastrians in theirs, so long as it doesn't hurt someone else means nothing to those who aren't Catholic or Mormon or Zoroastian. Does anyone else think this era of completely unnecessary...I don't even know the word for it...offense? is going to end soon? It's like people are trying to be out-offended by other people. Just lay off...that's my opinion.

musings...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 18:43:00 +0000

I have a computer at work, but because it's an Army computer, it doesn't allow me to see things like blogs, social networking, videos, most newspapers, magazines...you know, the good stuff on the Internet. I am able to get into the MWR once a day or so where I can use the Internet for a good thirty minutes. It is pretty tight in here with soldiers and Ugandans and Filipinos and smells like...soldiers and Ugandans and Filipinos who are working and don't shower too often. Needless to say, it's not pretty.

In any case, what I mean to say is simply that I have a lot of time to read during the day, but not a lot of time to write...at least on here. So, in those occasions I do have the opportunity to write, I will have to keep it short due to time constraints and the horrendous smell.

One of the first things I wanted to point out was that I had read an article about the economy in South Carolina that made me feel incredibly sad and impotent. Sad because these people seem to have no hope, even if though they haven't seemed to lose faith, and impotent because I suddenly realized that, other than my voting habits, I can do just as little to help these people as I can the Iraqis who live outside the wire. Knowing people are hurting and not being able to help is just a horrible feeling.

The article is here if you care to read it (and I recommend you do). The article is very well written and reminds me how varied experience is throughout the states. Growing up, I rarely, if ever, thought of life outside of California. I did in an abstract sense, but it wasn't until I joined the Army that I met someone who...say...didn't like the Beatles, or went to a High School that was just one building, or had never been to the beach. Those are all shallow examples, but I quickly realized that if people's life experience was so vastly different from mine in such shallow ways, then it had to be true of their deeper experience as well. I have tried to learn of those differences, and grow from them, but it is all too easy to become inwardly focused. I read an article like this, and it opens my eyes again, in a good--but difficult--way.

A second article I read was just a short graph on Andrew Sullivan's website (I don't believe he made the graph). But it showed the disparity between those whose parents have a college degree and those who don't. Below is a quote from a quote taken from Andrew Sullivan's website:

The truly amazing thing to me is that parental income isn't just crucial in getting to college, and getting through college -- its effects linger on, basically, in perpetuity. One of the most remarkable findings from the Pew Charitable Trusts' Economic Mobility Project is that a child from a family in the top income quintile who does not get a college degree is more likely to wind up in the top income quintile himself than a child from a family in the bottom income quintile who does get a college degree...

The article links to slides that Geithner used for a speech, but doesn't include the text of the speech. That being said, statistics are just good ways of lying, but they are quite shocking in any case. I'd be interested to hear from my friends who know more about economics than I what you think of this.

Comparing it against the article before, I was wondering if maybe we put too much stock in college degrees. It doesn't seem to me a degree should be (or is) a magic bullet that will keep someone from being poor. What good is a degree if you live in a rural area where there is no business? Maybe what we need is an economy that offers good jobs that aren't education intensive, but still give back to society in a productive way. This isn't to say that people who live in rural areas don't deserve education or the opportunity to gain a college degree...far from it. I just think we need to think more outside the box. (<-and yes, I realize "think outside the box" is trite and meaningless anyway...but I'm tired...and in Iraq...so give me a break).

Lastly, I just found out that a friend of mine (and a fellow member of the E3 Eagles) is running for Congress in California. His name is Anthony Woods. If you're from California, or care about progressive politics, I suggest you check out his page. I haven't talked to him since he announced he's running, so if you read this...Good luck!

http://anthonywoodsforcongress.com

choices...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 10:58:00 +0000

Choices are rarely between two things, one of which is good and one bad. Normally, it's something that's good, and something that's also good, or bad, and also bad...otherwise it wouldn't be much of a choice. (For a fun example, imagine someone offering you an ice cream cone on a hot day or a kick in the groin...not much choice there. Now, imagine someone offering you a glass of ice cold water, or a chair under a misty, shady tree...not so easy now is it?)

The last month has thrown me into two situations that present me with the good/good or bad/bad scenarios that are much less fun to decide, especially when they're real life scenarios instead of the cool vignettes they used at school where you'd debate what to do about SGT X and then go back to your room knowing that SGT X isn't real. Once I got commissioned, SGT X became real, and now my decisions affect him/her in real life...so it's not nearly as fun.

OK, so what am I talking about? I had to recommend a soldier for the first time to get an article 15. The outcome is that said soldier (SGT X), is no longer going to be on Team Hero with the rest of us, and he lost a pretty awesome professional opportunity that would have taken the second half of his deployment. Why did I do that you ask...well, SGT X just couldn't get to work on time regardless of how many chances, stern talkings-to and counselings I wrote. The thing is, SGT X is also, without question, the best soldier I have at the job he does. So, do I allow a House-like soldier ("House-like" references the television show that I recommend you all don't watch because it's a by-the-numbers piece of crap complete with poorly scripted lines recited by poorly acting actors) who is convinced he doesn't have to "play by the rules" because he's just too good and valuable to be lost, or do I recommend him for the punishment knowing I will be losing a valuable member of the team? See...bad/bad. Or, good/good, depending upon how you look at it. In any case, I made the decision and now, I'm here...about to sit on my first article 15 hearing. Not fun.

Secondly, I got my first OER, that's like a performance review in the civilian world. The OER was kinder than I had expected. I'd always said that when it came to my conduct/performance in the Army, I would try hard not to listen to anyone telling me to do things a certain way. I figured, I would do them my way and, if "higher" liked it, then I could stay in and maybe I would be happy in the Army since I was, after all, doing things "my way." If, however, "higher" didn't like my way, then we would part ways and, in the end, at least I'd have some military experience and I wouldn't have spent five years jumping through hoops trying to be something I'm not. Well, apparently my way wasn't frowned upon, so that's good. I do, however, have to decide what the future holds for me.

What I'm about to say is ironic, and I realize that, but in general, I don't feel like I get a sense of service that I thought I would. (The irony is coming...wait for it...wait for it...) So, I think if I got out of the Army and pursued other venues, maybe I will get that sense of service I long for (<-that was it, if you missed it). I'm not really enjoying the intel world, but I do like leading soldiers. Unfortunately, because I'm an intel officer, I won't be leading soldiers any longer once we get back to Fort Hood, and that means the intel world and the life of an intel Officer beckons. So, what's the choice I have to make? What do I want to do when I go back? Here are the options:

Stay in the current unit and be a desk jockey doing paperwork and other organizational things on Battalion Staff. The upside: I don't have to go be an intel Officer & I would learn valuable organizational skills I currently lack. The downside: it's a miserably thankless and boring job far from the soldiers, so what little sense of service I currently get will be much lower.
Try to be a Battalion S2 (intel officer). The upside-er...I'm not sure. Technically it would be a great career move and, if I stayed in the army, would give me a lot of good experience. The downside...I haven't seen a happy S2 since I've been here. The hours are long, the job is thankless and there's never an "end" (imagine, if you will, someone putting pieces from three separate puzzles in front of you with no photo to guide you. Every few hours, they put more pieces there in a pile and, for a year, you just keep nugging away trying to piece together these puzzles. The puzzles are never finished and, in a year, you just give your half finished puzzles and a big stack of pieces to someone else. Oh, and the whole year, other people come and yell at you for the puzzle not being finished...that's intel work.)
Possibly do option one for a half a year and then be a Minority Outreach Officer for West Point. The upside to this one is obvious, besides the fact I'd have a chance to work at school again (and anyone who's read this more than once knows I bleed black and gold), I'd also have the opportunity to maybe bring some high-school aged kids into an experience that helped formed me. The downside? I don't know if I want to "opt out" of the "real" army like that or not. It feels almost like cheating, especially with the unit probably going to Afghanistan in a year (that's just a guess, but probably a pretty good one).

So, there you go, another decision...good/good/good and bad/bad/bad. So what do you do then?

And, more decisions to come...do I go to Grad School on the Army's dime, but then owe them more time? Do I get out and risk...risk what? everything? Damn choices...life was so much easier without em.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 09:41:00 +0000

I don't have a lot of time (as you can tell by my monthly posts, if that), but I read an article today (Connecting the Dots: The Link Between Gay Marriage and Mass Murders), the premise of which is stated here:

"It most certainly is not my intention to blame the epidemic of mass murders on the gay rights movement! It is my intention to point out that the success of the sexual revolution is inversely proportional to the decline in morality; and it is the decline of morality (and the faith that so often under girds it) that is the underlying cause of our modern day epidemic of mass murders.

In response, I have posted a link to Steven Pinker's TED talk, where he argues that we currently live in the most peaceful time in the history of humanity. It's interesting and far more persuasive than the article.

http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/163

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Sat, 14 Mar 2009 05:34:00 +0000

I opened (e-opened...it's online) the Stars and Stripes (a compilation of other news sources)today...that's the newspaper that they give out for free in Iraq, and saw a picture of my friend from school. He was at Fort Hood with me, and now we're both in Iraq. I found it rather poignant considering what I sent out last night, that this article was in the same paper officially announcing the death of LT Hyde.

Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Army sports. The West Point athletes always amazed me. They did the same things I did, the same training, took the same classes...but were also so good at their own sports that they competed at the NCAA level against athletes at other colleges. Alex's story isn't all that rare, surprisingly. Along with him, I can count three other soldier-athletes I know of who have had the opportunity to go to the Olympics, one of whom chose to pursue that goal (Mike Benedosso, 110lb boxer), and two who chose not to. One of those two, Emily Hannenburg, a fencer, is now in Iraq leading a platoon and the other, Laura Walker, was killed in Afghanistan some years ago.

It's a rare privilege to be awed by ones peers, but a privilege nonetheless. I only hope that at the end of my year here, I'll feel as though I've done something to have earned being in the same category of these others who have given so much--quite literally their lives and their dreams.

As for now, I still feel like an impostor, much as I did the whole time I was at West Point, as though some twist of fate has allowed me the privilege of seeing behind the curtain, but that at any minute, someone will check a roster and say, "wait...you're not supposed to be here..."

I do like what my friend Mark said about my job, which gives me some comfort:

While we may often only see the face of a watch all of the gears behind the scenes are even more important to the operation of the watch.

well done, be thou at peace...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 15:46:00 +0000

I don't know how to eulogize someone I was not friends with, but who still made an impact on me. What do you say about someone you admired, but did not know--someone whose example was enough to make you want to be a better person. Dan was that kind of guy...the kind of guy who, when people spoke behind his back, they said things like "he deserves more" or "he's really one of the best guys I've ever known". It was praise given in private because Dan was the kind of guy who didn't need praise.

This is a picture from graduation, a happy but bittersweet day, when you had to say goodbye to those you'd gone through so much with knowing you might not see some again. That's Dan, in front. Always in front...he was a leader.

I don't know what else to say...anyone, literally anyone, who knew him will tell you, we have lost someone great. Someone who the world is a lesser place without. All I can say, as we do everytime we lose a classmate, is what I hope someday I will have earned hearing said about myself--

Well Done Dan, Be Thou at Peace.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 10:37:00 +0000

The Shield is a television show that I have come to view as the antithesis of West Point. I don't know how it ends, but the basic story line involves a bunch of cops whose primary allegiance is to one another instead of to their higher calling, or profession. Each episode has them lying, cheating or stealing to protect themselves or their friends--and my guys love the show.

We've watched something like five or six seasons now (and, by "we" I mean they have, but I live with them so I have to listen). The acting isn't that great (minus the season with Glen Close) and the weekly plots are pretty predictable of bad cop dramas.

Recently, an issue came up where I immediately knew that it would garner me an ass-chewing. I wasn't too upset, I'm a Lieutenant, it happens all the time, but my guys didn't see it as such. Immediately they began to devise elaborate plots and schemes, told me what to say to minimize the impact. Everything from equivocating to outright lies. One of them said, "Sir, there's gotta be some Shield kind of scheme we can come up with." While he was joking, I was hurt.

I can't help but wonder if I'm doing something wrong, or if maybe I've given them the wrong impression. If, after 15 months of working together, they honestly think I'd rather lie than get small but stern talking to about something not even that important, then they don't know me as well as I thought. But I don't think that's their fault. Character should, it seems, be something that people can tell about you through experience. It is suddenly apparent to me that through their experience, they have misjudged my character--and that is on me, not them.

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 16:24:00 +0000

My friend Nick is now home. He has been for a while actually, and is settling in again. He and I spoke often for the short period we were here together (although far enough apart that we never saw one another) about our plans and lives and thoughts. I wrote him recently and one of the things he said stuck. He said he missed the simplicity here.

I was thinking the same thing this morning, that I am, in some ways, blessed that for a year, I get the chance to lead a life most people will not. Unencumbered by fashion, traffic, bills, fast-food, MTV, radios, muzak etc. etc. etc. All those things that make you feel like you're living but which dominate your life to the point you want to escape them but didn't even know that's what you wanted until suddenly...you're in Iraq...and it's quiet at night. And you wake up to the sound of...nothing. And you don't know what time it is or what day it is, but it's OK because it doesn't matter.

I've read a lot here; books Tim sent me, or stacks of magazines from Patrick and Valeria, and letters and postcards from home. I had an English teacher who told me once that "good writing was good thinking" and, while I believed him then, I am now hoping that good writing can inspire good thinking, because I've had the chance to experience, through reading, some of the most beautiful things over here that I otherwise would not have.

I still worry, even removed by half a world from family, one cannot stop worrying about them, or (lest I lie through omission) about myself. I don't know how bad this financial crisis will get or what I'll do when I get out of the Army. I read some things from Peggy Noonan (who I encourage everyone to read) talking about life and moving forward and maintaining optimism. She wrote that some people moved in with their families and that doesn't seem to bad to me at all. Maybe the day is coming again when families didn't split apart, when I can see my sisters daily and have meals with them more regularly than I do meals wrapped in waxed-paper sitting in my car.

I realize I'm rambling now and I apologize. I don't get online as often as I'd like, at least, not with the time or inclination to write.

Lastly, thanks to whomever left that last comment. It was an interesting article. Hopefully once this is all over, I'll have more time to reflect upon what being a Lieutenant in Iraq "means". I'm not sure if it's just a foible of my personality that I tend to downplay whatever it is I do, but when I read of other Lieutenants, I can't help but feel I should be doing more. But, again...I still have nine months to do amazing things, so we'll see...

noreply@blogger.com (Adam) — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 15:57:00 +0000

Some years ago, I was hanging out with a friend of mine from Colorado. It was around voting time and he came up to me incredulously and asked, "I know you all [he meant minorities of any stripe I believe] get your own months, but do we really need a Cesar Chavez Day? I don't think celebrating a boxer is all that important." I explained to him that Cesar Chavez wasn't the boxer, but the man who fought for equal rights for field workers across America and is often compared with Martin Luther King in terms of what he did for "his people" (a term I don't like...as though different colored skin makes one group a completely different people). He understood what I said, but had been so incredulous from the begining that even after my explanation, the idea of voting for a Cesar Chavez day still sounded absurd to him.

It seems the same thing is happening with the stimulous bill. People who don't really know what it is they're decrying, but do so with enough incredulity it sticks, are slowly killing what the country needs. They yell out, "Family planning!?" or "Hollywood!?" and the italics indicate that tone they can use...and then, no matter how easy it is to explain (ie. Hollywood provides jobs to Californians, one of the states most hardly hit by the economic meltdown), it's too late--the level of disdain for the idea they thought it was lingers over and then Hollywood is cut from the stimulous.

I understand bi-partisan, but seriously...when Republicans were in control, democrats were called "obstructionist", now the Democrats are in control and they still can't do anything because the Republicans are an even more minor party and dragging their feet as well...only this time, it's not called obstructionism, it's bipartisanship.